I was never the girl who planned her wedding; who cared about flowers, cake or even who the groom would be. I was never the girl who imagined where she would live when she grew up or what she would do for a job. I was never the girl who planned how many children she would have and what their names would be. You see, I never thought I had the option. I never thought I would live long enough to see those days.

The few, and I mean very few, people I have admitted that to act shocked to hear…but why??? How am I supposed to feel or what am I supposed to think when diagnosed with a disease at the age of 10 and immediately (yes, immediately) told of the life ahead filled with heart disease, blindness, kidney failure, amputation... or the many people you encounter who feel it's their obligation to let you know how their neighbor's sister's uncle died a horrific death from the disease. Those may be just stories to some, but it's reality to me, so why would I plan for my future? What future!?

Almost 23 years have passed since I was the little girl laying on her parents' bathroom floor-- all 50-pounds of me too weak and dehydrated to walk back to bed, wondering what was wrong with my body. Though the exterior has changed, the fears of that 10 year old little person still lie within me.

If you asked me today if living with Type 1 Diabetes bothers me, I would immediately say, “No!” In fact, given the choice to live with the disease or not, I honestly believe I would just keep it. I know no other way to live. And truly, I mean that. Having said all of that, I sit here in my living room writing this with tears soaring down my cheeks. I can’t keep them back. It's not the shots that bother me. It's not the exercise or the clean eating. It's the fear of losing my sight or one of my limbs that terrifies me. 

There is so much I want to tell you. Whoever you are. Perhaps you’re a parent or sibling of a Type 1 Diabetic. Married to or dating one. A person in the medical field (and I really hope there is someone out there in the medical field reading this because I definitely have something to say to you!) or maybe you’re someone like me… just taking it day by day, living with Type 1 Diabetes or some other illness...

I want you to know: You're going to be OK. We All Are.